It's a fickle old life

		My happiness relies upon relationships -
		Fair enough - 
		Except that I rely upon relationships
		With girls,
		Not upon more sturdy friendships,
		Or an eternally stable relationship with God.

		My fickle heart -
		Relying on one girl today,
		With no real chance for anything true -
		And another on the morrow,
		Again so little chance -
		Just a fickle reliance upon beautiful girls...

		And it gets me nowhere;
		Not when I repeat the same stupid crushes,
		Upon the same people -
		Or different -
		It doesn't matter -
		I already know 
		That none of them are yet for me,
		And still I am so ready to fling with one!

		Why do I feel this need?

		To trust you, Lord -
		That is what I want -
		For with that
		I need nothing else -
		Your fulfilment,
		Your purpose,
		Your teaching.

		May you grow in me Your love, Lord,
		And may I know it to be
		Far surpassing this fickleness
		Which I exist within now.